Tulips, Change & Emotional Accountability

I stumbled into Amsterdam during the spring bloom, home of the tourist-raved tulip garden, Keukenhof. This Holland gem is a garden park covered in millions of blooming tulips and other bulb flowers. And due to the nature of, well, nature, it is only seasonally open during the tulip bloom, less than 60 days a year. 

As spring is in full transition here in Europe and tulips pop-up along the autobahn like California poppies, I am reminded of beautiful change. I am meeting new friends and saying goodbye to old ones. I am seeing new places, but also revisiting my local Italian spot because I know their Gnocchi is delicious.

I am coming back to the teachings of my yoga practice and re-dissecting the law of impermanence.

Everything in life is temporary.

We’ve all heard this before. But how do we recognize when we are suffering at the mercy of change?

We attach ourselves to people, places, or periods of our lives, that will inevitably change. This attachment is normal; we are living, enjoying, maybe even surviving?

We revisit old themes, masked as new vignette’s and either listen to our intuition or navigate on auto-pilot, disconnected and unaware of the risks of the weather conditions that make up our life.

Finding acceptance of what I have no control over, but taking radical responsibility for the part I play in this cycle is key. Honestly, we are all just stumbling this earth searching for meaning, acceptance and safety. ✨

So here’s my blurb on our emotional and spiritual contribution;

Our thoughts birth our feelings which trigger our actions which create new thoughts...the perpetuating cycle of the human experience.

But did you know that we control our thoughts? This is our hidden super power. And we all have the potential to master this. Although some may be naturally better or experienced in understanding and regulating thought patterns, it can be learned and trained.

And whatever those thoughts are, they produce a feeling within us...good, bad, indifferent, lonely, doubtful, excited, passionate, and so on. And then based off that feeling we just enjoyed our endured, we take action.

We respond or react (and yes, there's a difference) based on our prior conditioning, our perceptions, traumas and conquests, alike.

Perhaps the thoughts that brewed [insert feeling here] is why you can't get out of a bad habit you've been trying to shake. Perhaps that looks like staying busy to avoid the negative feeling or maybe it's numbing with substances, people or toxic outlets? …Or maybe, you've been doing your work (go you!) and you can digest those feelings and choose to take positive or intuitive action. 

Whatever it is, there is a way to interrupt this cycle and rewrite, rewire, and relearn our actions. This, in turn, can change the thoughts that follow your actions, impacting the feelings and, essentially, the trajectory of your life! (Haha, if only it were that simple 🙄)

I am by no means an expert on this idea, as I have only just begun to implement it, but it has helped me instill emotional accountability into my life. 👁

(Man, don't we need more of that?)

So, how do we rewrite, rewire, and relearn our actions? 

There's a lot of neuroscience and methodological processes out there, but here's my unlicensed and fellow healer take on it...

Find yourself at that spot between FEEL and ACT, right when you're feeling depressed or angry or _____, and you are about to respond/react,

engaging with loved ones in a toxic way,

reaching for something to take that edge off,

or shoving it down and going on with your day…

STOP. Allow yourself to feel. 

Recognize the feeling that has triggered a certain physical response and acknowledge it (with grace) as something that is is NOT in alignment with your higher self, God, or the human you want to be.

Don't worry, you don't need to stay here very long. Just long enough honor that feeling, as it has arisen for a reason. That action you are about to take has protected you or helped you manage that feeling before, but now, it no longer serves you.

Life starts now.

Recommit a different action. That may literally look like going and washing your hands every time you feel like you want to smoke a cigarette. Maybe it’s going for a 5 minute walk in silence instead of texting your ex every time you hear that song.

Whatever the shitty action you are aspiring to rise above to heal and grow, just do something else. Literally anything.

You are rewriting the pattern. Copying over that mixtape. You have a choice. To keep living the patterns of your life (& maybe the patterns of your ancestors), or, take radical responsibility for your life and your happiness.

Over time those little actions are not so small anymore. Your small feats and accomplishments may inspire you to recognize other things in your life that you allowed to perpetuate. As Robert Wilson says in his book title, “You Have the Power to Change Your Life.” It is really, that magically simple. 🔮

As we continue to learn and understand the divine nature of change, it becomes easier to greet it with honor, surrender to it, and even partner with it as we continue down our path. It is through the power of our thoughts, that we have the ability to influence the world and do our part in this synergistic cycle of the Universe. 🌱

In the infinity of life where I am, 

all is perfect, whole, and complete, and yet

 life is ever changing.

There is no beginning and no end,

only a constant cycling and recycling

of substance and experiences.

Life is never stuck or static or stale,

for each moment is ever new and fresh.

I am one with the very Power that created me, and this Power has given me the power to create my own circumstances.

I rejoice in the knowledge that I have the power of my own mind to use in any way I choose.

Every moment of life is a new beginning point

as we move from the old.

This moment is a new point of beginning for me right here and right now.

All is well in my world.

― Louise L. Hay

You Can Heal Your Life